Archive for ‘Christmas Specials’

December 25, 2011

Jelly Christmas 2: Scientists discover neural basis of yuletide

by Lucas Wilkins

A team using advanced brain analyzers have discovered the true nature of Christmas. Using cutting-edge technology along with very very complicated statistics they have proved that Christmas lies entirely between our ears.

The experimenters at Lapin University placed a number of subjects into an expensive brain scanning machine and showed them a series of stimuli that invoked festive responses. When shown the stimuli the neurons in two parts of the midbrain – known as the corpus visci and corpus vini – lit up like a Christmas trees.

“We’ve found the grandmother neuron… but for Christmas!” said senior scientist Dr. Joulupukki – referring to the neurons that light up when you see your grandmother. “I call them the Grandfather Christmas neurons”, he quipped before a sustained period of forced laughter.

Some of the stimuli used by Joulupukki et. al.

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December 23, 2011

Jelly Christmas 1: The N days of Christmas

by Lucas Wilkins

The song, Twelve days of Christmas raises a number of important questions, like who gives milkmaids as presents? and will this song ever end? But most importantly, it makes us ask: If every day was a day of Christmas (like some may wish), would it still be physically possible to sing the song?

Here’s how long it took to sing each verse on the John Peel show one year when the great man was still alive:

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